New Year, New Everything!

It has been awhile since I have had the chance to write anything. I sure have been thinking about a lot of things to write, but just haven't had the time to do it. Well, I am going to take these few moments I have to share some thoughts.  I feel like I am on the verge of....something. I am not sure what exactly.  I just feel like things are "opening up" for me.  This year, I will turn 40.  That used to scare the hell out of me. 40 was my "scary" age.  Now that I am nearly there, I am not so afraid.  Why the hell should I be afraid of an age? This is my life, I make what I can and want out of it so why be scared of something I can't change?  Age isn't scary.  This is part of living and I personally am so grateful to still be on this earth LIVING my life. 

I feel that I have spent a lot of my life being afraid of things.  Afraid of flying. Afraid of failing. Afraid of getting hurt.  Afraid of death.  fearfearfearfearfear.... If not fear it has been worry.  Worrying has taken up so much of my life and it makes me sick.  Worry comes with the territory when you become a parent but I worried about things long before I became a mother.  I feel like worry became part of my life at birth.  I pray constantly that I may worry less.  Well, I am finally taking charge and I am going to embrace my fears and take control of the worry that wreaks havoc on my life!  No more will I be kept up at night worrying about a bill I haven't paid or the strange and crazy illness I am afraid my husband or child might contract.  I am on a mission to rid myself of all of the nonsense! 

I do realize that I will never completely stop worrying about my child.  She is the light in my life.  My main purpose as her mother is to keep her safe, healthy and happy and I will always try to do that for her.  But the senseless worrying, the crazy thoughts that creep into my head during the early morning hours keeping me awake have got to stop.  I recently heard someone say, " Worry is like a rocking chair.  It keeps you busy but you don't get anywhere." So very true! 

This is my year for letting go of fear and worry.  I know it will take a lot of work, but I am not afraid of hard work!  I. Can. Do. This!  What are you going to face head-on this  year? What are you going to let go of? Think about it....